Poor guy. Seriously. It was like the time I thought I’d rather drown in burning oil than feel sorry for Actor cum Doctor Vijay. Now I do… Oh and post-IPL debacle, add Sourav (Dada) Ganguly to the list. Now he prefers to be called Sourav (Ta ta).. Gangrily! To the ever-expanding list of the people I feel sorry for(tentatively titled “The Woesome twosome”), add about one million Chennai males who travel by public transport buses (my favorite topic.. again!). Yes, I may be a hardcore feminist (I read Femina religiously), but when it comes to a turning point, my sympathy is apparent. Before we delve deeper into the topic, let me first categorize the types of men who travel in Chennai city buses.
1) Men who are drunk
2) Men who are not drunk
3) Seriously. thats it! Simple!
Type-1 bus-travelling men:
Now a scene in which a person is traveling by a MTC bus at 10.00 pm with a drunk fellow boarding it may sound ominous, but pepper it with a 100 more people (yes, and the 38 guys who religiously run alongside the bus) in bright sunshine and an already-nagged-by-wife-in-the-morning conductor and sleep-deprived driver, you might as well rub your hands in glee and order a big carton of popcorn. There have been atleast 22.4 instances during the past 1 year when a drunk-as-a-fish man boarded a bus that I was traveling in and proceeded to pour out his grief. These guys always have my sympathy. But then there are the cocky-drunk fellows, who always usurp ladies seats and refuse to budge. They always meet with either of the 2 fates:
1) Thrown out of the bus
2) Thrown out of the bus AND slapped by a policeman.
Moral of the cocky-drunk man’s story: Never EVER ever sit in a ladies seat. Never.
Moral of the grief-stricken drunk’s story: Man, more Old monk might do the trick!
PS: I hate the latest flashy-looking buses in which exactly 8 seats (i counted) are allotted for the ladies and remaining are all occupied by men. It is this kind of behavior that makes me want to lose respect for bus-traveling men. Seriously guys, give up! (pun intended, yes siree!)
There was this really old drunk man (must be about 130.37 years) who came and sat next to me in the ladies seat!! Of course he requested permission first (Rule: In Chennai MTC buses, Thou art shall ask permission to occupy the maid’s seat. Axillary: Even if both seats are empty). I uncomfortably nodded my head. The knight in shining blue uniform at once came to my rescue, requesting the man to relocate to the “not ladies side” of the bus. While moving to the “not ladies seat”, the grand old man sourly remarked that he asked permission from “thangatchi“(sister) and only then did he venture to sit next to me. Only after a few seconds did I realize that “thangatchi” meant me. And he must have been atleast 150.25 years old. The gall some 150.25-year-old bus-traveling drunk men have!!
Type 2 “undrunk” men…to be continued